He was understanding, and said he would go to human resources and try to
get me some help. That was almost three weeks ago, and I have heard
nothing since. If he doesn't come back with the 'right' answer..(an
assistant), I will apply for disability. But he has been allowing me to
use freelance help more..so I feel that is a positive sign.
Doc, I have friends that have been in my life since the early 1970's,
one of them had an exhibit of her artwork last year. It was not far
from where I live, but when the day of the opening came, I was just too
fatigued to go. She was angry at me for a long time after that, but I
think I was angrier, that she, who has full knowledge of my health
problems, and has seen the progression of disbility, was not
understanding and forgiving. I too have wished that someone could feel
what I am feeling, both physically and emotionally, for five
minutes...because I don't think anyone truly understands otherwise.
They may try to empathize intellectually, but sometimes that's not
enough.
Well, that's enough of my venting for now. I am just thankful to you
doc, and all the people here, who TRULY understand.
love and peace to you all,
Kevin
>Karyn:
>
>Elated to see that you have found people who seem to understand the
>complexity and limitations of TM. I went out with friends (so to speak)
>tonight and because I have both legs missing they seem to understand
that I
>have physical limitations. They still have no clue as to what TM is all
>about and that there are physical limitations associated with it. God
forbid
>that I might bring up the psychological/emotional factors associated
with
>TM. The struggle that we all have is evident. The fact that we have
one
>another becomes more and more obvious as each day passes. How do I tell
them
>that I might pee or poop on myself and maintain my own self
worth/dignity
>and respect at the same time. How do I tell the one I care about that I
>cannot walk on the road or beach for even awhile because I might fall
down.
>I have no clue.. How do I say "get away" when they try to cuddle me
and
the
>mere skin contact causes pain and discomfort. How does one feel and
have a
>full existence when touch is not comforting and that stimulation above
and
>below the waist is nothing more than touch. If all is well I can feel
the
>kiss on my cheek but then all is lost. Somewhere in the higher beings
grand
>plan I must be destined to experience and some how survive a real trial
in
>my life. There cannot be another being regardless of their worldly or
>spiritual being who would inflict or desire that another mortal
experience
>the pain, discomfort, anguish and psychological impact that those of us
with
>TM experience. There are those of us who have lost significant others
solely
>because of TM. Fairness is not even a topic that belongs in this
thread. I
>JUST CAN'T DO IT !!. If they do not care enough to try to understand
what
am
>I to do ??? A bunch of us didn't make it and there are a ton more who
fear
>that they won't make it with their significant other or potential
>significant other because of what we HAVE (TM) and are what we are with
what
>we have.
>
>To close, all I can say is that we have one another and that as a group
we
>are the only ones who can truly understand. Our significant others
truly do
>their best and understand as best they can. I have told more than one
>person, live in my body for five minutes and then you will truly
understand
>what it feels like to have TM. I and the world of words cannot
>explain/define what I truly feel physically and emotionally. I love
them
>and all of you for being here/there or wherever in your contact with
the
>plague that we call TM. Please take care of you and those who you
might be
>with and take care of.
>
>Doc
>
>PS. Hope I didn't go too far but this is how I'm feeling right now.