[TMIC] Re: [Re: [TMIC] Neurontin]

Peter & Mandy Feka (5yearitch(AT)netscape.net)
2 May 99 09:25:55 EDT

Dear Angela,
My heart goes out to you more than you will ever know. I too was
very physically active, (I am 33 in July), I also suffered with tremendous
weight gain at the onset of TM because of steroids and inactivity. I have had
TM for five years. I am the mother of three, 6,8 & 10, and know exactly what
you mean when you say " I hate asking for help".
I too have great difficuly asking, feeling that my children and my home are my
responsibility in front of God. But I have learned that "asking" or
"accepting" help can be part of the process of taking care of my
responsibilities, and that my "not wanting to" is more of a case of ego than
moral obligation. I fight daily with TM and all of the wonderful presents it
left me, but I don't belive that a mother's love has to have arms or legs or
physical attributes for the children to know that they are loved and
appreciated. Quite to the contrary, my six year old (Blake) and I have grown
tremendously closer, and at a very young age he has learned to consider that
all people can't do all things, and is very accepting and helpful to those he
percieves "need help". I am proud of the way he wants to hold my hand so I
don't fall down, and the way he insists that "mommy let me do it, it's going
to hurt you." My son was a baby when I became ill, and i cried almost every
night for a long, long time wondering what kind of mother I could be to my
children in this condition. My son has taught me that I am his mother, and his
choice of mothers, and that it really doesn't matter what we do together, it
matters more to him that I am here with him, and that he knows that he is the
love of my life. Blake eases my mind when I feel "picked on" by life. He
reminds me that what you can or can't physically do, or what you look like is
NEVER more important than who you are. I look at him, and listen to him, and
know that I am a wonderful mother, and that god has blessed us both with each
other. I feel for you in your efforts to attain a "goal weight", I would be
happy to share with you anything that I did that might help. But please,
please keep in mind, who you are is the most important thing about you, and
who you are, is in your heart, not on your hips ! Take care of yourself, and
thanks for letting me know that I am not a loner.
All the best to you and yours,
Mandy :-)

Ander3353(AT)aol.com wrote:
> Hi Doc,
>
> I must say everyone has been so friendly and I have learned so much
> here. I have only been dealing with TM since July 11, 1998 so it is going
to
> be a year soon. I know at first the doctors kept saying well you should be
> alright in about three months. Well needless to day three months have come
> and gone and I still experiencing a lot of the original signs. But I really

> can't complain. After reading what so many of you have been through, I feel

> very lucky. I think my most difficult thing to deal with is that I was a
> pretty independent person until this and now I have to keep asking people
for
> help. Well actually my friends pretty much ask what they can do, but I
would
> love to get back to being able to do it myself. The most frustrating part
of
> TM is for the last two years I had been working out six days a week, and
lost
> about 70 or 75 pounds. (I have had a weight problem all my life). I was
> feeling really good and looking great when all of a sudden this happened. I

> have gain so much of my weight back and it just absolutely upsets me. I
keep
> hoping that I will be able to get back to working out hard again so I keep
at
> it.
> Well I guess I have rambled on long enough. See what happens when
> you get me started.
>
> Thanks so much to everyone here because you have all helped with
> terrific information. You all are truely wonderful people.
>
> Angela

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