Re: [spousal support]

Peter & Mandy Feka (5yearitch(AT)netscape.net)
29 Mar 99 13:40:38 EST

Alton - Thank you ! It occured to me that my husband had to do the same things
for me that your wife did for you. He has loved me and taken care of me when
necessary for five years. He has also spent most of it crying somewhere
because he wasn't telling me anything but, "honey, you're my wife, I love you,
I couldn't not do it." I have a wonderful husband, who has overwhelming
emotions sometimes, not unlike myself. He doesn't say and do what I would with
those emotions, but then again, my way wouldn't make everyone happy either. I
agree that a tremendous number of things have to change for Peter and I to
have what we want in our marriage, and you just made me realize that he may
never have talked about it to anyone, and is just now trying to with me, and
because of the anger behind those feelings, and his tone of voice, I am taking
offense at things that need to be said in order for him to get throught this.
Thanks for the dose of patience Alton, and keep them comming. Mandy

Alton <A.Ryder(AT)ix.netcom.com> wrote:
> I'm ready to carve a piece of granite with my
> fingernails or do something else as difficult to
> show my appreciation for my wife. I have before
> stated my appreciation for her support during this
> malady, but the recent sharing of tales of less
> spousal support has heightened my gratitude.
>
> When I first came home from the hospital, I had
> neither the strength nor the flexibility to attend
> to my own needs. I was in bed, in diapers, and
> wearing a Texas catheter. All of which needed
> frequent changes. I could recognize an impending
> bowel movement, but I could not resist it. I
> remember Betty answering my call in the middle of
> the night to come attend to the bedpan and to
> clean me afterward. I wonder if I could have been
> so uncomplaining if she were the one who was ill.
>
> Even now, almost two years later, her support and
> her willingness have not diminished. Thankfully,
> the need for such support has almost gone away.
>
> I am so lucky to have married her.
>
> Alton, who intends no hurt to those less fortunate

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