Jo, please don't feel like a failure because you haven't shown improvement as others are expecting you to...One of my biggest gripes is that people are always saying things like--if you have the will, you will get better--well, sometimes there aren't any more improvements to be had. My son has the best attitude and sense of humor and will power you possibly ask for and he has "recovered" so much from where he was....but, he is still in a wheelchair and no amount of attitude is going to make his legs move. The most important thing is to always keep trying, keep a good sense of humor about yourself and be thankful for the recovery that does happen. It is very hard for me to watch my son live life in a wheelchair...It snowed a foot of snow here the other day and normally he would have been the first at our local ski hill and he would have been there all day long...but as it is now, he had to wait until someone could take him up there and he only lasted about 4hours....He was feeling a little blue about it too, but he said "It was great to get out on the old hill today, ma. Remember a year and a half ago I couldn't even scratch my own nose!" Jake used to win contests flipping that snowboard upside down and backwards, now he rides a butt board and the biggest trick is getting over to the tow rope....but he still had fun doing it...and that's how ya gotta be....But please don't give up hope on more recovery. We see some every day. Good luck Judi
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> From: jo.macey(AT)sims.co.uk
> To: tmic-list(AT)eskimo.com
> Subject: a difficult time
> Date: Sunday, January 03, 1999 7:56 AM
>
> Hi, I don't want to become unpopular by asking the next question so fingers
> crossed I don't......
> My Neuro said "we can't be sure if you will make a full recovery" ok this is
> fine but......I had a bad week at the beginning of December and my husband
> rang Addenbrookes Hospital and spoke to a consultant that didn't really know
> who I was but said the following to my husband "we expect a full recovery
> blah blah blah" I am having trouble now with the will I/won't I senario and
> basically if the recovery I have had in the last 3 months is the biggest
> step (which is improved from when TM first happened) then fine I can kinda
> get on with things but my husband (through no fault of his is trying to be
> very positive) because they are expecting a full recovery I'm feeling
> somewhat ummmm of a (I can't think of the word I want to use) failure (I'll
> use that term lightly) because I'm not making the improvement I feel they
> (family) are all expecting and this is making me feel extremely pressurized
> (I KNOW stress doesn't help anyone) but I don't know how to say "hey, look
> yes I've had a good day but don't expect too much my body will make progress
> when it wants too and I don't have much say over it", but this always comes
> out negative and that's not what I want so any ideas - does anyone know of
> anyone that's made a full recovery with no relapses???? I'm sorry I know
> this is my problem and I feel very selfish with the ME,ME,ME stuff - my
> moods are very up and down and I want to be happy, smiling but I can't get a
> grip on things at the moment and yes I am one of the lucky one's great
> family, friends and this makes me feel even more selfish :-(
> I'm sorry everyone - I hope you all had a great christmas and new
> year.......
> Oh yeah! The Red Cross gave me a wheelchair at last so that's a success and
> I will be going to the gym to try out their treadmill should be fun
> Love to you all
> jo
>