OT: Parents' Glossary of Kids' Kitchen Terms
Ownmeny(AT)aol.com
Sun, 13 Dec 1998 17:54:34 EST
Appetizing: Anything advertised on TV
Boil: The point a parent reaches upon hearing the automatic "yuk" before a
food is even tasted
Casserole: Combination of favorite foods that go uneaten because they are
mixed
together
Chair: Spot left vacant by mid-meal bathroom visit
Cookie (last one): Item that must be eaten in front of a sibling
Crust: Part of a sandwich saved for the starving children of: China, India,
Africa, or
Europe (check one)
Desserts: The reason for eating a meal
Evaporate: Magic trick performed by children when it comes time to clear the
table or wash dishes
Fat: Microscopic substance detected visually by children on pieces of meat
they do
not wish to eat
Floor: Place for all food not found on lap or chair
Fork: Eating utensil made obsolete by the discovery of fingers
Fried Foods: Gourmet cooking
Frozen: Condition of children's jaws when spinach is served
Fruit: A natural sweet not to be confused with dessert
Germs: The only thing kids will share freely
Kitchen: The only room not used when eating crumbly snacks
Leftovers: Commonly known as "gross"
Liver: A food that affects genes, creating a hereditary dislike
Lollipop: A snack provided by people who don't have to pay dentists' bills
Macaroni: Material for a collage
Measuring Cup: A kitchen utensil that is stored in the sand box
Metric: A system of measurement that will be accepted only after forty years
of
wandering in the desert
Napkin: Any worn cloth object, such as shirt or pants
Natural Food: Food eaten with unwashed hands
Nutrition: Secret war waged by parents using direct commands, camouflage, and
constant guard duty
Plate: Breakable frisbee
Refrigerator: A very expensive and inefficient room air conditioner
Saliva: A medium for blowing bubbles
Soda Pop: Shake 'N Spray
Table: A place for storing gum
Table Leg: Percussion instrument
Thirsty: How your child feels after you've said your final "good night"
Vegetable: A basic foods known to satisfy kid's hunger - but only by sight
Water: Popular beverage in underdeveloped countries